Category Archives: Party! Party!
Entertaining guests with food allergies and special diets
I have hosted shellfish sensitivities, gluten intolerance, vegetarianism, veganism, kosher rules and, yes, even a chicken allergy. No lie, all these and more have paraded through my front door and presented themselves at the table expecting a savory and delicious meal that will not send them into anaphylactic shock with the first bite. So I know a thing or two about feeding high risk dinner guests, and I’d be delighted to share my expertise with you.
Here’s what you do:
- Order in pizza two hours before your guests arrive, then eat it. This is crucial. You’ll see why.
- Go to the ATM and make sure you’ve got plenty of cash on hand.
- Check the liquor cabinet and restock any bottle that is less than half full.
- Chill the wine and champagne. You’ll want both.
- Practice saying the following: “I hope you like scallops / pasta / veal / eggs / uncleanly butchered pork! Oh my goodness, did you tell me that? I totally forgot! More champagne / vodka / grain alcohol mixed with green Koolaid?”
- Repeat that final question ten or fifteen more times. Don’t take no for an answer.
- Order in Chinese food. That way any tongues that swell or get swallowed are not your fault.
As any good host knows, you need to match your guests drink for drink, so here’s the hottest of hot tips. On the odd occasion I’m a tad over-served, I dissolve two tablets of Airborne in a glass of warm water and drink it right before turning in. I often leave the “works” by my bed to ensure I remember this important step even if I’m a little “tired” at bedtime. Of course, this may not work for you, especially if you have many sensitivities and allergies yourself. I only speak from personal experience, however scant.
Cheap AND Easy: Go ahead and get screwed
courtesy http://thehairpin.com
I love screw top wine. There, I’ve said it and I’m standing by it. Loud and proud.
As far as I can tell, there is absolutely no difference between the corked and the screwed, and I for one am ready to throw off the tyranny of broken corks, moldy stoppers and malfunctioning corkscrews. At last count I had thirteen different models in varying states of collapse squirreled around the house waiting to be pressed into emergency service when the current favorite snapped, disappeared or otherwise failed.
And then there is the horror of the cork slipping into the bottle in front of company. Makes no nevermind to me, of course, but my party guests have, on at least two occasions, taken issue with my pouring wine through paper towels to filter out the little cork crumbles after just such a malfunction. Waste not, want not! Needless to say, they have not been invited back, not that they’ve asked, but there you have it. Anyways, when it comes to wine and corks, the strain of the lurking unknown and the fear of failure have always conspired to seriously undercut my enjoyment, though let’s be honest, not enough to reduce my intake. That’s just crazy talk.
Here’s my favorite screw top white, by the way: Terranoble Sauvignon Blanc from Chile. I’ve sourced it locally for $6.99 a bottle and with a 15% case discount, it’s almost free!
Here’s what winedepot.com says about it:
This Sauvignon Blanc offers a pale yellow colour with greenish tones. It has attractive fruity aromas with a touch of peach notes. It’s a fresh wine, with a balanced natural acidity, medium structure and permanence in mouth. Ideal as an aperitif in summer time, with seafood and fish.
I don’t know what that permanence in mouth business is all about, and really with the exception of my original fixtures, a couple of crowns and some lovely veneers, I don’t think there’s anything I want permanently in my mouth, but to each his own. Here’s the swiller’s review: A perfect party wine, light, but not too sweet. Serve ice cold with whatever you’re eating, or if you’re just drinking.
Case Discounts: The slattern’s secret to avoiding emergencies and cutting costs
Patsy and Eddie, Courtesy bbc.co.uk
If someone offered you ten to fifteen percent off the price of that bottle of wine you’re currently swilling of course you’d accept. Well, just in case you didn’t know, any decent wine shop will give you at least ten percent off if you buy by the case. Sometimes you can get fifteen percent off for unmixed cases, or if like me, you shop at the same store so often you could probably get your mail there.
Cheers, Sweetie!
Salad: A bottom-up approach
Again, I must tip my hat to the one and only Madame Hodgkins for this invaluable tip:
When making salad, always mix up the dressing in the bottom of the same salad bowl you’re going to serve it from, then throw in the tomatoes and any other chopped vegetables. I like a little avocado and red onion, but if you feel the need to bung some carrots or cukes in there, have at it. The last thing to go in is the lettuce. (And really, does anyone use anything but the pre-washed, bagged stuff anymore? I know you’re supposed to wash it and I always intend to, but…Anyways, you really should wash it before you eat it. Let’s leave it at that. But I digress.) The only things you really should hold off adding until the moment of service are crumbled cheese and nuts.
So once you’ve got the dressing made (unless of course you’re drawing from the big stash in your fridge) and everything in on top, you can cover it with a damp paper towel and let it sit on the counter for a really long time — I’ve let it go two hours — with no ill effects, as long as you don’t toss it. Leave that until the moment you’re ready to serve it. Takes so much stress out of company meals and allows you to spend the time you’d normally be assembling salad having a life giving drink and a happy chat with your guests. Perfect!
Diva Special
A friend of mine recently achieved a major weight loss. It involved tremendous willpower, daily gym visits and more self denial than I will ever be capable of. But here’s the fun part: it also involved a cocktail, which she has aptly christened the Diva Special and given me permission to share with you.
In a tall glass with ice, pour:
- triple shot of vodka, preferably the good stuff, but whatever you have on hand will do
- splash of cranberry juice
Add enough club soda to fill the glass, and a wedge of lime.
Swizzle and sip.
I’ve noticed this tastes even better when I’m wearing red shoes and large stones, by the way. Just sayin’.
Kitchen Slattern 